As I was washing my face last night and looking at myself in the mirror, I had this overwhelming sense of awareness of being alive and being who I am right at this very moment. Not like an “enjoy the moments” type of mantra I always talk about, no….. this was a very different feeling, and one that I have not experienced since my dark moments back in 2014. It was an awareness of my own mortality, and a deep feeling of thankfulness for everything that I am, for all the different roads that have led me to where I am, and for all the unknowns of tomorrow. As I looked in the mirror at the gray hair shining so brightly around my hairline and scalp for what seemed like a good 4-5 minutes, I couldn’t help but feel so thankful to have them. To be able to have gray hair, even at the age of 44, seems like such an honor. An honor that so many don’t get to experience.
I don’t know if it is all the news of people dying unexpectedly and far too young that has invoked such thoughts in me randomly, but as I fell asleep last night thinking all these profound thoughts about aging and dying, the feeling of unmatched thankfulness consumed me.
Today is not a holiday where we all become thankful for things. I have not personally experienced a life shift recently that would naturally bring on such thankfulness……no, today I am thankful just because. I am truly and deeply thankful for strictly being alive.
I don’t know why I feel like I have to share this, but for some reason I want you to know a few other things I am thankful for that would usually make me think badly about myself:
My gray hair because I still have a full head of hair.
My stretch marks because they are reminders that I have given life.
The 5 pounds I have gained since March because it means I have plenty of food to eat.
My wrinkles and age spots because it means I have laughed and enjoyed sunlight.
Yes, all of those things may seem silly to say out loud to you, but they are not silly to me. They are who I am, and I am thankful for all of those things that make me who I am. I know there will still be days where I don’t embrace those things as I seem to be doing at this moment, but for today, this overwhelming sense of thankfulness is very nice to have.
What about you my friend? What are you thankful for today on this random Tuesday in June? What are you thankful for just because? If you are having a hard time trying to figure that out, I encourage you to start with the most simple thing, yet most important of all……you woke up this morning, and you are alive. That is a great place to start, and once you start your thinking with an attitude of thankfulness, it is amazing to see how quickly our perspective changes. We see more clearly that there are SO many things to be thankful for in our lives.
I wish this feeling of thankfulness for you today my friend.
Make it a great day today!